To Have and to Hold
by DragonWyrd
Summary: This is the first of a trilogy surrounding the life of my warden Reagan Cousland and Alistair after the Blight was stopped


_**To Have And To Hold**_

The wedding was tomorrow. Oh how those six months flew by, though to Alistair, the time just seemed to crawl. His bride-to-be was ensconced within Arl Eamon's estate, surrounded by Leliana and Wynne, while he was stuck at the palace staring at the correspondence strewn over his desk but not actually seeing what was in front of him. By Andraste's flaming sword was he supposed to concentrate on his duties when the day he had been looking forward to was just around the corner? In just under twenty-four hours, Reagan Cousland was to become Reagan Theirin, finally his by the laws of state and country, under the watchful gaze of the Maker. Sighing, he pushed back his chair and stood, pacing a bit before finally walking over to the beveled window to stare down at the courtyard below. For the past six months, every minute felt like an hour, every hour like a day, and every day like a month. Knowing that this evening she wouldn't be staying with him, made the time slow down even further.

"Arghhhhh," he groans, gripping his fingers in his hair, almost to the point of tearing the strands out of his scalp.

"Be calm, little brother," an amused voice sounds behind him as a firm, yet gentle, hand is laid on his shoulder. "I don't see my sister enjoying the sight of her beloved with bald spots on her wedding day."

Laughing, Fergus Cousland steps around Alistair to lean against the wall, facing the younger man. His eyes take in the impatience in the amber eyes of the king and the nervous excitement keeping him from being able to truly stand still. Shaky hands run through the short strawberry blonde hair as Alistair's gaze had returned back to the normal scene outside the window.

"You really love her, don't you?" Fergus asks quietly, recognizing the anxiousness easily apparent, as he had felt the same way the day prior to his own wedding to Oriana.

"Maker's breath, you have no idea! I still wonder how I ended up so lucky to have someone as beautiful as her want to be with me… _**ME**_! I am… was… am a bumbling idiot who had no idea what to do and she stepped up and took over without ever making me feel incapable of doing the job set out before us. Her kindness and compassion shone like a beacon everywhere we went, not only making sure all of us were all right, but trying to fix as many wrongs as she could with each new place we visited. I fell apart when I lost Duncan, but she stayed strong, helped me to be strong, even while dealing with what had happened at Highever. How could I _not_ love her?" His eyes shift from the window to Fergus, the truth of his words shimmering in their depths.

"From what I heard," Fergus begins softly, "it was you who were her saving grace, as she puts it. Your humor at virtually any situation helped to lessen the burden she felt. Knowing you were by her side, your own strength and compassion, helped her to forge on and become the person everyone needed her to be. She told me… she told me how you would hold her at night when everything seemed too much to bear, when she herself was still coming to grips with what happened to our family, when her nightmares of that night would wake her up screaming. I'm glad she has you, Alistair."

"I… I… she… she said that about me?" His voice incredulous as he sinks into a nearby chair, his eyes glistening as he looks up at his soon to be brother-in-law. "I… oh wow… thank you! I'll do my best to be the best husband to her, I swear!"

His own eyes a bit wet with the promise of unshed tears, Fergus nods and walks over to Alistair, clapping his hand on the man's shoulder.

"I know you will. Two people more perfect for each other, I've never seen. Oh how I wish mother and father were here to see this day. Father never worried about it much, but mother was close to tearing her hair out in worry that Reagan would never find someone willing to marry her, not being as keen on the 'softer arts' as mother put it, as she should have been. Now, before we get too maudlin, we have a bachelor party to get to. There are a few people waiting outside the door for us, so let's get a move on, shall we? "

A panicked look crossed Alistair's features as, at those last words, the door opened to reveal Zevran, Oghren, and Bann Teagan Guerrin. His eyes lingered most on the dwarf and the elf, knowing that somehow they'll find some way to get him into trouble.

"Look, we don't have to do this, do we? I mean, let's be honest here, with the spirits Oghren has to be carrying, and the women that Zevran draws, I'll be lucky to survive the night. I'd really like to show up at the altar in one piece, and _**sober**_ for my wedding tomorrow. Reagan will kill me if I don't die first!"

The four men just laughed as Zevran walked over to yank Alistair out of his chair. As they semi-forcefully escorted him out of the office and then out of the palace, the elf tsked and shook his head at the now very nervous bridegroom.

"Don't worry yourself so much, my dear Warden. We're just going to drink and be merry. Besides, I don't want the gift I left for your little minx to go to waste, which it surely shall if we don't get you back in time," he snickers, shoving him into the carriage now bound for the Pearl.

"You what? You got her a gift? Do I even want to know what it is? Knowing you it's something perverted," he sighs, cringing a bit as he sees the establishment they're pulling up to. "By the Maker, what are we doing here? I don't want a part of this, oh no!"

"Don't worry lad, the ladies inside are for the rest of us. I don't want Reagan punting me across the city if we had paid for one of 'em for ye," Oghren laughs as the group makes their way to one of the back tables.

Surprisingly enough, the evening was enjoyable, with Alistair getting only slightly sloshed and all but him and Fergus deciding to take some time with the ladies of the Pearl. As they left and he was later deposited into his room to sleep off what little he had drank, he couldn't remember the last time he'd ever laughed so much, or blushed so much at the bawdy tales that Zevran and Oghren chose to share.

~oOo~

The day dawned bright and clear. Alistair's hands shook as Teagan assisted him with donning his king's robe over his finely tailored clothing. He turned around to see Eamon standing behind him, the older man's eyes misty, as he reached up to place the crown lightly on Alistair's head, adjusting it until he was satisfied.

"Are you ready, your highness?" Eamon asks, clearing his throat as he sees the young man he had always considered a son, about to marry a young woman to whom he now looked on as a daughter.

"Oh Maker am I ever! And please, no 'your highnesses' Eamon. I'm so nervous. I'm so excited. I'm so… so… is it time yet? I can't think straight. Can we go now, _please_?" he implores, shifting from one foot to another like a young boy, unable to contain his excitement.

"Let us go. The crowd and your guests are eagerly waiting to see this just as much as you are to do it," laughing, Eamon takes Alistair's arm and guides him to the door.

~oOo~

"You look so beautiful, Reagan!" Leliana exclaims, as Reagan twirls around in her dress, the white silk billowing out around her ankles. "I can't wait to see Alistair's face when he sees you in this! Here, let me get this on you."

Leliana leans up to place the delicately wrought crown of Andraste's grace, interspersed with miniature gems of diamond and sapphire, upon Reagan's head, with a veil of finely crafted lace to flow down her long raven hair, created especially for her as a collaboration between both the dwarves and the Dalish.

Grinning, Reagan leans in to place a kiss on her friend's cheek before yet again readjusting the bodice of her gown. Reaching over, she picks up the gloves, making sure to slide the middle finger of each hand through the loop to hold the gloves in place as she pulls them up to stop just below where her arm meets her shoulder.

"I can't wait to see the look on his face when he sees me wearing the gift that Zevran bought me. What little there is to wear of it, that is," laughing she again twirls around again, her eyes sparkling with the intense joy that seems to thrum throughout her body.

"Oh, I know, right? Did you see the look on Wynne's face when you opened up that package and pulled it out?" Both women choke a bit on their giggles as they replay the scene of Wynne's eyes going wide and the fish out of water purse of the woman's lips along with her "Well I never!" exclamation.

A short rap on the door before it opened quieted the women down as they notice Fergus peeking his head around to look at the two of them before fully entering the room.

"It's time to go ladies…" he trails off as he gets a full look at his sister, her face glowing, in her wedding gown.

"You are so beautiful, little sister. Alistair is a lucky man," he whispers, a bit choked up at the sight of his sister all grown up and about to be married.

Not able to say anything, her eyes now pricking with tears, she leans up and hugs Fergus tight, burying her face into his chest. His arms come around her and he holds her there for a moment before pulling back and looking down at her.

"We have a wedding to get to. Wouldn't do to have the groom wait too long. He might decide to take matters into his own hands, rush in here, grab you, and drag you down the aisle himself!" Grinning, Fergus takes Reagan's hand and places it on his arm as Leliana rushes over to grab her bouquet of Andraste's Grace and roses before heading out the door in front of them.

~oOo~

A chorus of flutes fills the air as Leliana begins her walk down the aisle, Fergus and Reagan not yet to be seen. As she makes her way down the long carpeted path, she watches Alistair, warmed from within at the look of pure happiness in his gaze that matches that of her best friend. As she takes her place and the flutes change tune, she notices his eyes widen and fill with the purest of emotions, love, as he finally sees Reagan at the end of the walkway. The crowd stands, Alistair's hand reaching out to grab Teagan's arm and she's barely able to hear his whispered "By the Maker, have you ever seen anything so beautiful?" as his bride continues down the aisle.

A tear slides unnoticed down Reagan's cheek as she approaches the altar near where her beloved stands, the emotions welling up inside her almost too much to bear. Her hand grips her brother's arm tightly as they make their way closer. Understanding what's going on inside her, Fergus brings his other hand up to place it lightly on his sister's and they exchange a glance, her smile and her eyes clearly expressing her joy at the day, along with the lingering sadness that their parents are unable to be a part of the celebration. Before she knows it, her hand is being placed in Alistair's and the two of them are taking the last few steps to stand before the altar and the Revered Mother behind it.

"Maker's breath, but you're beautiful. I am a lucky man," he whispers to her, repeating word for word what he had said the day they shared their first kiss. Before she can reply, the Revered Mother lifts up her voice and the ceremony begins.

"Under the watchful eyes of the Maker, we stand here today as the two separate lives of King Alistair Theirin and Reagan Cousland are bound and formed into one. Two souls unite, and where one is, so shall the other, their hearts as firmly entwined as their beings. They take their vows, before Him and those witnessing here today, that their union may truly be blessed with his love. To quote from the twelfth verse of Transfigurations:

_O Maker, hear my cry:  
Guide me through the blackest nights  
Steel my heart against the temptations of the wicked  
Make me to rest in the warmest places._

_O Creator, see me kneel:  
For I walk only where You would bid me  
Stand only in places You have blessed  
Sing only the words You place in my throat_

_My Maker, know my heart  
Take from me a life of sorrow  
Lift me from a world of pain  
Judge me worthy of Your endless pride_

_My Creator, judge me whole:  
Find me well within Your grace  
Touch me with fire that I be cleansed  
Tell me I have sung to Your approval_

_O Maker, hear my cry:  
Seat me by Your side in death  
Make me one within Your glory  
And let the world once more see Your favor_

_For You are the fire at the heart of the world  
And comfort is only Yours to give._

He has given them his comfort by leading them to find each other. He has taken their sorrows by giving them joy in the love between them. They have stood in the places he's blessed, having found the resting place of Andraste, and he has led them through the blackest of nights, given them strength, to fight and win against the Blight that had taken hold of our lands. Today we witness his next blessing upon them as they take their vows, pledging themselves to each other and to no other, for all eternity."

Reagan's fingers entwine with Alistair's as her gaze is fixed on his face, yet another tear escaping down her cheek that he reaches up and brushes away with a light touch of his thumb.

"King Alistair, do you pledge to love this woman as the Maker loved Andraste, being there for her through all her trials, lifting her up when she is down, and forsaking all others, for as long as you draw breath?"

As the Revered Mother speaks, Alistair turns to face Reagan, taking both of her hands in his, brushing the pads of his thumbs lightly over the palms of her hands. His eyes never waver from her face as the question is asked of him.

"I do," his voice rings loud and clear.

"Reagan Cousland, do you pledge to love this man as Andraste so loved the Maker, staying by his side through all things, soothing his soul when it is turbulent, and forsaking all others, for as long as you draw breath?"

Reagan's eyes shimmer with the force of her emotion as she looks up at Alistair, her gaze focused on his features and the love mirroring her own within his eyes.

"I do," her voice sings with the purity of her answer.

"Then I ask that you exchange rings, and any words you have to say, at this time," the Revered Mother responds. A few sniffles can be heard from the audience, and surprisingly, Oghren looks like he's just about to bawl at the scene laid out before him.

Alistair reaches for the ring Teagan hands him, sliding it gently onto Reagan's finger, his eyes never leaving hers.

"When I first joined the Wardens and ended up at Ostagar, I had no idea what was in store for me. You had been through trials of your own and yet you walked up to me, so calm and sure, staying that way even as the events of the next two years unfolded. You were the light in the darkness, not just for me, but for all of those suffering. I was drawn to you from the first moment, but that light inside of you was what carried me through. You became my best friend, the love of my life, the other half of me. I pledge to do whatever I can to keep you happy and be the best man that I can be."

Reagan chokes back a sob at his words, a few more tears trail down her cheeks, and Alistair leans up to lightly brush them away. Before she breaks down, her heart feeling more full than it ever has, they're startled out of their reverie by the twin sounds of loud honking. Stifling a watery giggle, she looks over to see both Oghren and Sten wiping their noses with handkerchiefs and she turns an amused gaze up at Alistair, especially surprised to see the Qunari reacting so emotionally. She takes the ring Leliana hands her and slides it with slightly shaking fingers onto Alistair's, her eyes going soft again.

"The light in the darkness that you speak of, that was you lighting the way for me. You were my strength, the rock I knew I could lean on, the shield I knew would keep me from harm. You were the laughter amidst all that despair, the joy in my soul, the comfort when I needed a soft place to fall when everything became too much. I felt like I was dying inside when I first met you, but you healed my wounds and helped me to go on. You are my best friend, my only love, and the best half of me. I pledge to do whatever is in my power to keep you happy and be the person you see when you look at me."

"Then by the blessings of the Maker, witnessed by all here, I now pronounce you man and wife and present to those assembled King Alistair and Reagan Theirin. May you both walk in the Maker's light."

Amidst the cheers of the crowd, Alistair cups Reagan's face in his hands and leans down, brushing his lips softly against hers, before coming a bit more insistent, pulling back only when the hoots and hollers reach his ears.

"My wife… you're finally my wife. I can't believe it. I'm so lucky," he whispers to her before they face the crowd and begin the march back down the aisle, arm in arm, waving at their friends and others who had come to attend.

~oOo~

"I'm so glad the reception is over. I couldn't wait to get you to myself. I've missed you since you went and cloistered yourself at Arl Eamon's estate," Alistair calls out as he lounges on the bed, against the pillows, glancing over at the slightly open door to the washroom.

"I know what you mean! Then again the last few days just seemed to take so long!" Reagan calls back, adjusting the garment she had received from Zevran and muttering to herself, wondering how he knew her size, while also blushing at the thought of Alistair seeing her in it.

"By the way, love, what was this gift Zevran was talking about that he said he got you? I'm a bit worried about what his perverted mind came up with…" he trails off as he sees her standing at the door in a white filmy outfit, covering almost as much as it reveals, sliding over every muscle and curve as she makes her way almost shyly to the bed.

"You… you like it? This is what he gave me…" she flushes even pinker as she sees the way Alistair stares at her, his eyes wide and quite filled with heat.

"By the Maker we'll have to get you more of those!" he exclaims as they celebrate, quite enthusiastically, their wedding night - probably making the servants blush if anyone came near their door.

Resting her head as she lays it on his chest, playing her fingers lightly over the bare skin of his abdomen, she chuckles softly in the aftermath, relaxing and entwining herself against Alistair.

"I'll have to send him a note, I think, telling him that the suggestion he wrote down for you try in regards to arching your back is most definitely not necessary…" she turns her face up to his, grinning a bit wickedly. Laughing, Alistair just shakes his head and wraps his arms around her, pulling her close after he makes sure they're both covered, and snuggles with her under the sheets. She watches him as he falls asleep, adoring the way his lashes rest against his skin. Placing a soft kiss above his heart, she closes her eyes, joining him in his slumber.


End file.
